May 17th, 2007

dev

Deserved nothing at all

all my life is a joke, doesn't matter how much I tried, my life is meaningless to enyone i know. I have a firm belief that if I died, no one will notice it besides my family.
I feel so alone... I want to cry jet my stupid mask is there and to everyone i am smiling, yet no one can see that facade, nobody cares...

I do really don't deserve happines at all... will I die just knowing the bittersweet taste of love...

I do really feel like that, i have no shoulder to cry on, no ears to hear, no friendly smile or at least a cold shake of hands.

When my future starts to bright and I have a lil bit of hope in a better future he cames... he and now she too...

why did he told me that, why he was sad when i told him that i date, WHY AFTHER SO MANY TIME I STILL IN LOVE WITH HIM!!

i cannot cry... not anymore for him... i wish somebody told me what to do... I cannot trust myself when is about him... because... because... stills hurts so much
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    sad sad